The circle of life

Bryan and I couldn't be more excited about announcing to the world that we are preggers!! Although the pregnancy was not planned, we are over joyed and thrilled for the new adventure in our lives. Today I'm 12 weeks but I would like to take you all back a few steps and start from the beginning :)

On July 10th Bryan and I went wakeboarding with his family. It was a wonderful day on the lake, I landed my 180 on the wakeboard that I had been attempting since last year. My brother in law, Kevin, asked me about how on earth I have not gotten preggers while not being on the pill for the past 4 years. I pulled out my iphone and showed him my app that shows how a women's cycle works, as I did this I noticed that something was a day late. I'm never late. I played it cool. Bryan left for Improv camp Tuesday morning. By Wednesday I needed to know one way or another! I went to the store and bought a bottle of wine and a test. I was trying to figure out which one to do first...I poured a glass of wine, had two sips and went to take the test. It read positive. I couldn't believe it! I burst into tears. I was so happy and so scared all at the same time. I downed a glass of water and took the second test. Positive again! Bryan was at camp and wouldn't be back until Saturday. I decided not to tell him until I could see him in person. I wasn't sure how he would react and I didn't want to distract him from camp. Little did I know how hard that week was going to be.

July 14th (The day after finding out I was preggers)
All day I day dreamed about what our baby would look like and what the babies laugh would sound like. After work I got a call from my mom. My grandma had been sick for along time and was fading fast. She told me I needed to come down soon. I decided I would go down Saturday but Friday morning I got a text from my mom saying come down today. It's happening today.

July 15h
After work I rushed down to San Diego. I called Bryan and told him that shark week was late, just to plant the seed, and also tell him I was going to SD. I walked into my grandmas house to see my grandma (barely holding on) my mom, dad, grandpa, aunt kelly and uncle brad. I fell into my dads arms and cried. It was so overwhelming. A rush of sadness and helplessness ran over me. I sat down beside my grandma and held her hand. She couldn't talk or open her eyes. My mom told me the last thing to go was hearing, so I should talk to her. I kissed her cheek, told her that I loved her with all my heart and then I whispered in her ear "I'm pregnant." Her lips moved as if she wanted to talk but couldn't. My grandma was the first person I told I was pregnant and I will treasure that memory forever. As she left this world my grandpa, aunt kelly, uncle brad, mom and I laid on the bed and held her close. We told her it was okay to leave and that we loved her. My mom held me, we both held grandma and I held my belly. I felt such a strong connect between all of us. Sally Patricia Bradley passed away at 7:35 PM. It was a tough night but I'm happy I was there with family.

On the way home that night I talked to Candace, who was due any day now. She told me to come over and spend the night but I was too tired and just wanted to climb in my own bed. Little did I know she went into labor at 2AM.

July 16th
I woke up at 10AM to wonderful news that Candace was in labor. My week had been so crazy. A life created, a life left this earth and a life was entering this earth. I was having such a rush of emotions. I rushed to the hospital. As I walked into Candaces hospital room I burst into tears at the sight of my best friend with a tiny newborn (well not really tiny. Nathan Daniel almost weighted 9 lbs!). She did such an amazing job. She did it completely natural without any drugs. I'm so proud of her and her new little family. I so badly wanted to tell her I was pregnant but Bryan didn't now yet so I though it would be best to wait.

Bryan came home that day at 8pm and crashed. He was so tired from the week at camp. Little did he know, his world was about to change.

July 17th
We woke up and had breakfast. I could tell he was still tired from camp so I didn't want to tell him about the baby until the moment was right. When we walked back in the room he saw the box from the pregnancy test and lifted it up and looked at me. I asked "do you want to talk about this?" He asked "are we?" I nodded yes and he grew the biggest smile on his face. He pulled me on to the bed and we hugged. He told me it was a good thing. We both were scared but we were both super happy. I was happy that I finally got to tell someone. He was so supportive about my emotional week. The next step was to tell our families!

The circle of life is harsh and amazing, full of ups and downs. I miss my grandma so much. It sucks that she can't be here to see her great grandchild grow up but I must say that I know she loved this baby before there was a baby.